you will always be my one... itsumo...

i remember the time when i first saw him. it must have been a few months ago but it seemed longer. then i have tried thinking of how many times i've stared through his eyes and how many times i tried to figure out how he feels.

i tried so hard to see through him.

i tried so hard. his every smile... every moment he grins ... every time he held my hand... every time he touches my nape with his soft kisses...

it was so hard to think of him again... to think of how much i wanted to be with him, even though i dont know if he feels the same way...i tried to remember the time when i felt happy... the time
when i was happy without him... but i cant remember that feeling anymore... it was so hard to remember happiness without him...

i tried harder to think back but the farthest i could remeber was when i was lost in one of those remote sections of a bookstore at rockwell...piles of books everywhere...i was looking for a book where i could find a nice place to spend my vacation... i finally decided to get out of manila after a year of doing nothing but work...i didnt have anybody at that time... just me... no one and nothing really mattered that much so it was easy for me to just do some crazy things like plan something today and then turn my schedule around the next day.

i looked around to see maps and city guides where i could go for a relaxing getaway... my eyes was scanning at every book cover that just happen to be within my sight...

"copenhagen..." i read aloud, not knowing what i just did. his eyes glided away from the book and stared at me. i just put myself in middle of an unbearable embarassment when i read the cover of a manual that the guy who's standing beside me was holding.

"have you been there?" he asked. i felt my face turned hot. i knew i was blushing. i still didnt understand why i have to read out a signle word so loud.

"no... am sorry i was just thinking out loud." i struggled to get that out of my breath while i was thinking of the next sentence to say. "but i bet its nice there, scandanavian countries are fabulous places you know. you plan to go there?"

'fabulous????' of all the words in the english language, why do i have to use that obviously faggot word.

"am trying to figure out if it would be fit for me to go there without having to worry about having some scotish guy breathing down my neck for some piece of me" he bluntly let
the words out of his mouth while he had this peculiar grin on his face. "you know how they got the hots for asian boys"

i have to admit he was cute, in some degree. fair skin, wierd hair, eyebrows that have been well maintained and chinky eyes.he had a very distinct feature of an oriental boy, maybe a mixture of japanese and chinese but his accent was as if he lived in europe all his life.

it was sometime when ive realized that he began looking at me with a question in his head.i was staring long enough that he had noticed it. "am sorry but i havent really met any scottish guys... i mean... not in that sense..." i had been pausing too much, trying to think of the right thing to say. "but id love to meet someone... someday."

he smiled and was about to give a short giggle when he was called by some other guy from the other side of the bookstore. "i have to go, i'm YOSHI by the way" he bowed just like a typical japanese and he stretched out his hands towards me.

"i'm DAME... it was nice meeting you sir, maybe someday ill see you in copenhagen..." i reached for his hand and held it tight... he drew a raised eyebrow on his face and shook my hand gently.

"copenhagen maybe a long shot for us, here's my number... call me sometime maybe we could discuss places and finally decide on what place to go." he handed me his card and walked towards the mall's main lobby.